I wouldn't say I'm alright, but I've had worse days.  Apart from Wednesday, Thursday and Friday last week was...decent.

S and I have made a deal or it's more like a promise. If we both manage to keep our promises everything should be fine in a month or so. I'm trying to hold on to that, but it feels like I'm drowning. But! I passed one of my courses today, only one left now. I've been worrying about that since the middle of December so that was a huge relief. A new semester is about to start and I am happy-ish about my courses, at least two of them.  I always get weirdly excited when a new semester is about to start.

Other than that everything is as it usually is - which is craptastic. I feel horrible, everything seems pointless. I'm almost done playing through Theme Hospital so I'll have nothing to do once I finish that. I haven't heard anything from U. Texted her on Friday and today but she hasn't gotten back to me yet. Guess she doesn't want to see me. Can't blame her. I asked her to see me soon on New Years Eve but all I've gotten is a few texts. Oh well. I know it's only been a week, but I'm stupidly impatient.

So, to sum it up.

Still not doing too well. Still hate every day I have to wake up. Made an half-heartedly attempt to end things Thursday night but I woke up again. Had a discussion with S which ended in a deal. I'm pretty sure he's tricking me for all the right reasons but I have to believe him this time. Trying my best to keep myself occupied through-out January and need all the help I can get.